Heal Thyself First

As I connect with more and more women I am seeing that many have a desperate need for a man. I had one woman tell me that her ex-boyfriend put a gun to her head and told her to get out of his life. Stop following him, stop calling him and leave him alone. This woman felt that he was just having a "bad day" and wanted to know when would be a good time to call him and tell him that she loves him. I was absolutely amazed. This is definitely a woman who doesn't love herself. Why would she constantly pursue a person who clearly doesn't want her?

I recently read that it takes 11 years to totally get over the hurt of a past relationship. Although you have moved on the pain still lingers on. So imagine if you leave one relationship for another relationship for another relationship, that is at least over thirty years of healing. Who wants to go through that many years of hurt and trying to heal?

I have learned from personal experience that when you go from one relationship to another, you are not allowing yourself time to heal. You go into the new relationship with the scars and battle wounds from the past relationship. Although you are thirsty for love you still cause drama because you are not able to let go of that past relationship. You are standing in a karate position waiting to block any situation that comes your way because you fear being hurt again.

Usually when you go from one relationship to another you are desperate and will allow the first man or woman to enter your life, knowing that this isn't the person you would have given the time of day to in the past. So this relationship has started on a bad foot from the beginning because you are settling to fill a void in your life.

In order to heal, like in any situation you have to give it time. You must take the time to enjoy your own company again and learn to love yourself again. This is the time to start working on getting your finances in order so that when the right person comes you don't have to be financially needy. Start working on your home so that you will feel good about where you live. Start working on your spirituality so that you will realize that you are never alone. Get a makeover so that you can feel good about yourself again. When we lose someone special we tend to believe it had something to do with us and then we develop a low self-esteem. Start working on your dream, whether it is going back to school, taking a vacation or jumping from an airplane. This is the time to make your hopes, dreams and wishes come true.

When you have created a life you are proud of then you are less emotionally needy. You can go to the next relationship feeling more secure with yourself because you have made accomplishments in your life without the help of a significant other. Once you are happy with self and feel that you truly have it "going on" then you are ready to allow love in your life again. In the past when I have felt the most content in my life is when romance has come to me.

Today I challenge you if you are between relationships to start working on you and start working on your dreams. I guarantee that once you are at peace with yourself then you will be ready for the relationship made in heaven.

About The Author

Rondell Demmings refers to herself as a Vision Coach. She assist individuals in envisioning the life that they want to live and then taking the action to make that vision a reality. After living a life that was not authentic to her, she took steps to create the life she wanted to live. After eighteen years of Federal Employment she walked away from her good paying job to pursue her dream of being a coach. She specializes in personal growth, self-awareness and life transformation. Through her program "How to Get Your Groove Back" conducted on an individual or group basis, she motivates individuals to make positive changes in their life and to live a life that is authentic to self. She also assists home-based psychic/tarot readers in building clients and profits through marketing, training and consulting.

Contact her for a free 45-minute coaching session.

Email: Rondell@visionsilluminated.com

Website: http://www.visionsilluminated.com

Phone: 216-478-0302 or 1-877-869-0306

---

What Is Your Legacy?

During a recent speech, I told the audience that my... Read More

How to Make Self-Improvement Work Every Time!

There is an inherent problem with the approach most people... Read More

Character or Reputation

Character or Reputation. When we see these two words together,... Read More

Correcting a Gap Between the Teeth

As we age and our teeth shift, a gap between... Read More

The Cliché of Balance

The world we are living in is changing at a... Read More

The Magnetic, Attracting Power of the Mind

The power of the mind draws certain events, circumstances and... Read More

Your Gut Instincts & Ability to Get Along Quiz

How well do you understand how gut instincts ? yours... Read More

Principles for Total Prosperity In Business And Beyond

Are you looking for that "something" to give you the... Read More

What Next?

When we are faced with making a change we often... Read More

The Art of Perfecting the Life

First of all, you have to trust that you are... Read More

What Do You Want This Year?

Christmas is all around us, and many people are making... Read More

The Secret of Self Care

Wherever you go, there you are. There's no escaping it... Read More

Can You Change a Man?

Recently, at a public function where I was the Toastmaster,... Read More

Finding Your Passion

Where does our motivation come from? What makes us want... Read More

What Do You See When You Look In The Mirror?

'Image & Professionalism' we hear these words being thrown around... Read More

A Fun Way To Make A Living

"You must be willing to do the things today others... Read More

Jerry Green?s Top Ten Adversity Busters

I've navigated plenty of speed bumps on life's road. My... Read More

Getting the Universe to Work for You

Wouldn't it be great to know that you have something... Read More

Where Are The Punctuation Points In Your Life?

We live in a very busy age with many pressures... Read More

Create Your Best Life

"You can create what you want in life; first you... Read More

Break the Cycle

The other day I was walking out of a store... Read More

How Often Each Day Should I Read or Say My Desire Statement?

The purpose of the Desire Statement is to support you... Read More

Transformational Counseling - Part Two

Once one becomes present to his or her self-limiting belief,... Read More

Change Thorns into Flowers

If you had to write an annual appraisal on yourself... Read More

Would You Rather Be Wealthy?

Would you rather be wealthy or poverty-stricken? Not a difficult... Read More