If Ever It Is Me

With my father, his brother and their father having had late onset Alzheimer's I can't help but wonder if someday it will be my fate. This is what I have told my family.

If it is ever me with Alzheimer's disease please protect me. I don't want to be lost. I have a terrible fear of ever being lost. Keep me safe from those who would take advantage of my confusion. Keep me fed and clean and dry. That having been said...please don't try to keep me at home any longer than you can do it without taking a toll on your lives. If this is my fate let me be in a happy place in my mind where you are my babies and I will give you hugs and kisses even if I don't call you by name.

Let me be a part of your life but don't surrender your life for mine. I want my husband to have a wife. I don't especially want to meet her, but I do want him to keep living once I no longer understand. I want to keep as much dignity as I can for as long as I can and I want those who love me to understand that if I am not myself on the outside I am still me on the inside.

Bring me a puppy to cuddle, home made cookies to eat and soft blankets to cover me. Fill my room with pictures of my life so I can look at them and know I am loved.

Don't ask me about my life...tell me about my life. Feel free to leave out the times I wasn't at my best, or times that bring back painful memories (deaths of those I loved). Tell me about the good times.

Deborah Uetz author of Into the Mist, When Someone You Love Has Alzheimer's Disease

In The News:


BBC News

At a time of shared grief, let's not hurt each other
Jerusalem Post, Israel - 4 hours ago
India and Israel are hurting over the loss of lives last week. Why hurt each other at this time of shared loss and grief? The writer is associate editor of ...
Video: NY Rabbi, Wife Among Dead in Mumbai Raid AssociatedPress
• Laguna Chabad members mourn loss Coastline Pilot
After Mumbai Attacks, Chabad Movement Grieves Around the World Forward
Lubavitch.com - Daytona Beach News-Journalall 2,605 news articles

Taking the time to remember
Petaluma Argus Courier, CA - 4 hours ago
Maddox added that Light up a Life can also be an incredibly healing time for those grieving loss. “The first birthday, anniversary or Christmas can be a ...

Highmark Caring Place Resources Help Children and Families Cope ...
MarketWatch - 5 hours ago
"Children don't just 'get over' grief. They need time to learn to cope with their loss and the many other changes that often occur." To cope with grief ...

Grieving for a pet
Lynchburg News and Advance, VA - 21 hours ago
Strong bonds develop between animals and humans, so it can be extremely difficult to cope with such a profound loss. People deal with grief in many ways. ...

Hernando, Pasco hospices offer tips on grief during holidays
Tampabay.com, FL - Dec 1, 2008
Losing a loved one is hard, and that loss can feel even greater during the holidays. Finch and Quinones recently spoke to the Times about grief and offered ...

Farragut students react to loss of fellow student in car crash
WVLT, TN - 2 hours ago
Knox county school officials say additional grief counselors were on hand today, and will continue to be on hand as long as the principal says they are ...
Farragut senior killed in car crash WBIR-TV
all 3 news articles

Season of joy and sorrow
Stamford Advocate, CT - 13 hours ago
... she is likely to feel a renewed sense of loss. She hoped to stave off the grief by surrounding herself at holiday celebrations with people who make her ...

Rabbit Hole: finding humor in grief
Argonaut, ID - 20 hours ago
“So, it deals with how you handle grief and loss in existing family ties and relationships. Each scene is a slice of life. It is not melodramatic. ...

Lost a loved one? How to deal with grief this holiday season
ABC15.com (KNXV-TV), AZ - 8 hours ago
Realizing in advance that the holidays will be different, that there will be feelings of sadness and loss as well as memories which may be happy, ...

Teen still grieving over loss of father
Savannah Morning News, GA - Nov 30, 2008
A. While four years of grieving for a lost father may seem beyond expectation, the death of a father during those precarious adolescent years often causes ...
grief loss - Google News

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